I promise to myself that I will become a better person. I am in the process of doing so by my actions. I know I will be loved again. The void that he has left in me will only make me stronger as a person.
In other news.. for some reason, art seems to really interest me now. I took art in 7th grade but I had to drop it to pursue in band. I played the trumpet and french horn during my junior high years. I liked band but had to quit because of moving to the other side of the country. I wasn't so sure of the band requirements in Georgia so ya. I guess I can say I had a passion for it, but now I don't find band appealing. With art, you can express yourself freely anytime.. whether it be in class whenever your professor is boring you, or when you are alone. With band, you really can't take out your trumpet during English class and play it. You gotta do that on your own time. I think I found a new hobby that I can take up. I'm only beginning with sketches of objects with a simple white piece of paper and pencil. I'm gonna have to take it up a notch once I feel comfortable, but it is a relaxing thing for me to draw. I've also been mediating lately. It's incredibly helpful, especially when you do it right before bed. There was one point during my senior year, specifically in my ap gov class, my teacher, Ms. Brown was really stressed out over something personal (she really didn't tell us and we didn't really bother asking) and she decided to invite us into mediating with her. At first, it seemed a bit weird. I was sitting in my seat and we were in the dark, I think it was one of the days of the semester before winter break. Yeah - we were watching a movie but we were free to do whatever we wanted. She was laid back only if we weren't doing something relevant to the course. So anyways, it was basically a lazy day. She went to the middle of the room and sat down, inviting anyone to come. Well, about 8 people came to sat down. (I didn't go unfortunately, but I did try mediating that very night.) It looked like a kumbaya circle with everybody lightly holding hands and closing their eyes chanting that prolonged "UMMmmMMmMMmmmmmMMMmmMM" noise, with deep breaths in between. Yes it definately sounds crazy, but she stated that the vibration from the noise actually travels to your brain and spine and releases stress from your body. It did look and sound crazy with a bunch of my classmates mediating mid morning, but it worked! I tried it myself. I think I might be doing it more often. I have scented candles in my room and light them up - but I am thinking I should go buy new ones because these candles have memories. Yeah, I think I need to go buy new candles for sure.
Here's a video that I always watch. It's so inspirational to me and gets me back on my feet. I didn't really pay attention to the song that much until I watched the video and actually sat down to read between the lines when the lyrics came across my mind. I know this song is so overplayed on the radio, but man watching the video and actually sitting down listening to the lyrics was like a whole new door that was opened for me. Hope to those struggling with whatever life may be giving you, that you find some sort of inspiration through this song..
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag,
drifting through the wind
wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
like a house of cards,
one blow from caving in?
Do you ever feel already buried deep?
6 feet under screams but no one seems to hear a thing
Do you know that there's still a chance for you
'Cause there's a spark in you
You just gotta ignite, the light, and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July
'Cause baby you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe
You don't have to feel like a waste of space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow
Maybe your reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow
And when it's time, you'll know
You just gotta ignite, the light, and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July
'Cause baby you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, Oh, Oh"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe
Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
It's always been inside of you, you, you
And now it's time to let it through-ough-ough
'Cause baby you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, Oh, Oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, Oh, Oh"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe
Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
No comments:
Post a Comment