Lessons taught by observing and learning

Now playing: Hide and Seek - Imogen heap

I had a wonderful day at work today. I learned so many things, some stories touched me more than others, but I will write about that later. I met an elderly lady living in a small town about 900 people, in between the border of South Dakota and North Dakota. Life has changed by technology as kids are no longer growing up the way "they used to." I met another young lady, whose life was changed drastically by a major head-on-65-mph collision with a van full of kids while heading to a soccer tournament. It only takes a moment to change your whole life; for the better or for the worse. Another lady whose getting married tomorrow on 11/11/11. Love comes when the time is right, and should not be searched for.

Multicolored balloons filled the dining room floor.  It was my aunt-in-law's birthday.

She turned forty today, so I made a joke saying that she's four decades old (which is true!). She still looks like she's young. I believe I should "just go with the flow, and follow your heart and ignore everything else" (something along the lines of what Judee told me). She laughed and then she picked up the phone. It was her sister, wishing her happy birthday.

Just a couple moments ago, we gathered the entire family upstairs in the dining room and my uncle bought out the cake he bought for her. He actually had to stop playing the new COD game, or whatever new shooting game just came out just for his wife. He smiled a lot, and then we lit the sparkling candles up. The candles came in many different colors; pink, green, blue, and even a mixture of colors stripped! 

The moment came, and the happy birthday song begun. Everyone was smiling, and singing happy birthday regardless of what conflicts have been going on the family. For just that moment, I felt happy that everyone was smiling, so I smiled too. At that very moment, I knew everyone was focused on the cake, and the singing. Though not vocally talented in singing, I sang along too. We took pictures together as a whole, and the candles were acting up. It took several, more than 8 blows to knock those candles out. See, I even had to help blow out the candles but the candles that we got were "special," in the way that it never went out! You could keep on blowing, and it would stay "unlit" for a while, and then start the flames up again. It was an amazing sight, because the lights were off in the entire house and all you could see was the sparks from the candles. Oh yeah, my uncle bought 20 candles as a joke. I was like to my aunt, "You're turning 20 today right?" Hahah. Before you knew it, the candles went out and we were all clapping. Alllll smiles.

The birthday was a success. The cake was delicious. It was a four type cheese cake from Safeway - a store on the other side of town. The cake was divided into strawberry, chocolate, and vanilla, along with coconut. I chose to eat the strawberry slice, and my aunt chose the chocolate. My cousin Emily chose the Strawberry, Andrew chose the chocolate, and Robin the vanilla. Emily and I were the only ones that picked strawberry so we gave each other high-fives. 

I sat there eating my cake anxiously taking and actually "eating" each bite. The strawberries from within collided with my mouth, and created a SUPER delicious feeling. Everyone else was devouring their cake, as we do not get to eat sweets as often. For just that moment, everyone was eating, talking, and getting along with each other. That was enough to make me smile, and I will make sure that my family that I raise in the future will be great.

I felt at ease, happy, and learned that without struggle, there would be no happiness and appreciation. Even though my aunt can be a total butt sometimes, I'm going to look past that as she was raised differently. I know that she cares about me, as any human would knowing how I was raised with no dad, a mom that abandoned me and chose her boyfriend(s) over her children, and other misc. information. She may not be a perfect person, and may anger me at times, but I accept that. She might be my aunt in law, but she is still family. She makes my uncle happy, and their marriage has been successful in the way that things are going so far. Just think about it, three kids, a house, a boat, and everything that they could ever ask for. As long as their marriage remains filled with smiles, then I'm happy too because my uncle is happy.

Two minds can collide like an asteroid going hundreds of miles per hour towards earth, but in the end - what matters is your willingness to put up with the differences as life doesn't always go the way you want it to. You cannot control people's personalities, but you can definitely maneuver your mind in such a way that you think positively.. There's my two cents for tonight.

Good night,

Anthony

She goes by the name "Judee"..

A month ago, I was sitting in the reception area at work with my headphones on. It was a very slow day I could of swore you could hear a pin drop. As I watched the "people of Wal-Mart" pass by (which was a daily thing), I saw this lady walk towards our nail salon. She was very well dressed and I thought to myself, "She looks like she just came from somewhere formal." She wore a grey shirt with three white buttons. She walked with her head held high, graciously striding on her "one inch" black dress shoes. 

 From where I was sitting, you could tell her "mission" was to get her nails done. It sounds very silly, but when a woman has her eyes set onto the nail salon - they're most likely going to get their nails done. She approached the reception area from where I was sitting and I stood up and greeted her with "Hi! How are you doing today? What can I help you with?" as I would with everyone. I thought she was a mean looking lady at first, then her smile lit up the room (literally).


She answered that she was doing great, and asked me the same with enthusiasm. Normally, most people would not ask me in such a tone that she asked. It sounded like she really wanted to know how my day was going, and I told her that I was also "doing wonderful." She said she needed a fill, so I checked my appointment book for the day and said that I was able to get her in ten minutes from "now." She said "Okay," and sat down.  

She asked if she could use a pen, and I delightedly said that I will get her one. I try to be very happy at work, and it obviously shows through my "dimple-producing" smiles I give. I handed her the pen, and she grabbed her check book to write a check and gave the pen back. I thanked her for the pen, and she said thank you also.

A couple seconds later, my uncle tells me to start her fill by removing her brown polish that she had on and filing her nails down. I thought to myself, "Bummer!!" because I was so into my music at that time. My uncle's willingness to let me start her fill was a miracle..

I told her that I was ready to start her fill and explained to her that I was only going to be doing a minimal job and that somebody else, my uncle or our other worker - Annie, would be doing her actual "fill." She agreed that it was fine and I escorted her to our desk. Still, walking tall and proudly, she sat down and I sat down. She smiled at me, asked me a couple questions like 

• "How do you like doing nails?" 
• "How long have you been here?" 
• "What bought you to South Dakota?" 
• "Are you related to ----uncle's name goes here--?"
• "Are you going to college?"
• "Why did you choose to move to South Dakota out of all the places?
• etc

I personally, like to have a connection with my clients to know who they are so I respected her by answering her questions. Normally, people say you should keep personal life out of work life but I think some exceptions could be made. After answering questions and questions, ranging from college to what I wanted to be, and why I wanted to be a "nurse," she asked me "Are you sure that was the only reason you wanted to move to South Dakota?"

I paused removing her polish and sat there for a good thirty seconds to give a response that was suitable for the intense conversation that was going on. She saw in my eyes that I was holding behind something. I told her a brief description of why I actually moved to South Dakota..

"My mom decided to abandon me, because she put her boyfriend(s) in front of her own three children." I said.

She pulled her hands back, and looked into my eyes and told me..

"You are a strong young boy, I can see it in your eyes. I'm very proud of you, and I know you will accomplish great things in your life. Sometimes we have to put our heart out on a goal, and push everything aside that interferes with it. At times, people might push you off your track, but you are strong enough to put yourself back on track. I see you doing great things in your life, and I believe in you."

Those were the very words that she said. I didn't know how to react because I needed the extra push, all the pushes that I can get only drive me further to my goals. I had a "few" tears in my eyes.. She was truly an angel sent from above or something out of the ordinary that came into my life.....

She had her fill done by my uncle, and my uncle told her of my struggles in the past of how I was raised, how I have no dad, and the situation with my own mother. I don't mind him telling people about my life because there is no reason to hide what is the truth. 

I had to go home early that very day.. and I said my farewells to her, and wished her a great evening and walked out.

I was now at home and was helping my aunt cook dinner. Asparagus was on the menu for that night with rice. I heard the front door open and my uncle walks in and gives me this look. He walks to me, and in his hands is a hundred dollar check from "Judee." I was shocked because her service was only twenty dollars and she left a hundred dollar tip. 

My uncle told me she admired me for my strength, and my willingness to stay strong to support myself through college even though I have to leave my two sisters behind. She is an amazing lady.



Judee came in today to get her nails done. She got the usual color she would always get, something along the lines of a brown color. I started her off, and she and I conversated back and forth about our lives, what we have been doing, how are my sisters doing, etc. She asked me if I planned on staying around the area or leaving, and I told her that I was going to most likely go back to Georgia or stay nearby to keep a look out on my sisters. I thought to myself that I could support my sisters by myself after I have my career established with nursing, and probably settle down and have a family also here in the Black Hills. She asked me if any big upcoming events was going on, I told her that my state boards was coming up on the 15th of November, and she asked me what time.. I told her at seven in the morning. I made a comment saying that this license was my door to everything, and that it was a stepping stone to my future.

She then replied, "Is it okay if I say some prayers from now and to the time that you take your state boards?"


I said, "Most definitely."


She got her nails finished off by my uncle, and then she walked to me in the back and gave me a hug - saying that I will do wonderful on my boards and that I, as well as my sisters will be in her prayers, and handed me a check in which I did not check until I finished my client that I was on.. I was stunned that she gave me another check... I checked the check, and she wrote along the memo line "Bless you!" Very spiritual, and wonderful personality.


She made my whole entire day. No, rather, my entire life.. Thank you for giving me the extra push that could always be needed. It's not the amount of money she tipped that matter, but her sweet heart that always is a caring feature of her. I honestly feel like she is an angel, she comes randomly, and never makes appointments. I saw her at the mall the other day walking by and we stopped to chat, and the mall is about an hour away. I only came to pick up something, and there she was, just walking to my direction through the door. I would think no different if she left no tip or any amount of money because that does not equate to what she has shown me - what true compassion and understanding is. It's extraordinary because she wanted to become a nurse too, so we have a lot of similar things in common along with our giving nature.  


Here is the check:

FYI- I am planning on to not cash this check in. I'm keeping it on my desk where my books are along with some other personal belongings -- will post a picture sometime.


Thank you Judee, expect something in the mail sometime. 


She's truly a blessing, I can feel it!!! You know, that feeling of peace and protection? I don't know how to explain it. Good vibes. 

Remember, you have a lot to be thankful for whether you see it or not. For anyone going through tough times, just know that it will pass and that there will be better days ahead. Count your blessings, they can come from a random stranger or even just a hand written note that says "Bless you." Be good to yourself and others, and most importantly, love yourself and share it because the universe put us here for a reason - not to start wars, but to make peace happen. War is inevitable, but we can start our own peace with others. May protection be offered to those who wish to obtain it, and may the good spirits of those guide us through the journey of what we call - Life. In the name of __________, Amen.




Anthony

Beauty school is done with, apartment, COLLEGE.

Hey guys.

It's been a long long time since I've blogged, and I feel like now it's about time to blog. I kinda need to write out my thoughts right now and let you guys know I'm still alive (I am :P)

I graduated from beauty school a couple months ago.. towards the end of September. It was overall a great experience; I met a lot of crazy girls that I've ever met in my whole life. I laughed every day and had a blast though where were sometimes where I wanted to clock out because of all the things that went on in there with the staff that directly affected us as a student body. But that stuff is over with, so I'm glad I'm out of what people call now, "Hell-lines Academy." I honestly wish I could go back; just to see all familiar faces that became my awesome ladies. I still keep in touch with some of them and I can't wait to see where they will go in life. There's some really artistic people out in beauty school. Coming from all different type of situations, I could relate to some of them with coming from a troubled past and then excelling. 

After I graduated Beauty school, I received my temporary license to do "nails." Here in South Dakota, you need a license to actually even clip or "beautify" someone's nails (eg. working in a salon). I've been working full time with my uncle and occasionally would go down to our shop in downtown, which was about a 5 minute drive to and from our home. I get paid hourly but if my actual services performed (manicure, pedicures) surpassed the amount of my hour rate, then I would get paid whatever is the highest. So I guess that's good cause my uncle's an awesome guy by doing that. All my money that I've made has gone to the debt that I've occurred while attending Headlines Academy and I have about three grand to go. My day consists of waking up early, and then heading straight to work. It's been an exhausting few weeks.. 

We went to Denver a couple weeks ago to go grocery shopping since there isn't any Vietnamese stores here taking my uncle's toyota tundra. It's a huge truck that I have trouble driving with because it's a long bed/work truck. It takes about 8 hours to drive there to Denver and luckily there was no snow. My uncle said he goes there at least two times a year to stack up on supplies and most importantly, groceries in which you cannot get in the stores here. That's been a great experience to finally be in the city again, cars rushing down the highway and such. I drove most of the way but switched when we got in the city because the cars were so much. The traffic reminded of Atlanta during the afternoon where the cars would rush down the lane from both sides. I'm a comfortable driver but when there's too many cars running down the highway, bumper to bumper traffic, I get kind of "car-claustrophobic". I don't even know if that's a word but you get the point. We spent the weekend there and I got to see the city, so that was a change from the city I live in.

Family life.. well I guess it's going good. I get treated like a maid or housekeeper here by my aunt but that's alright because I'm going somewhere in life. We had a worker just leave today to go back to Arizona because she only works during warm months. She cannot handle the cold because it gets REALLY cold here during the winter, although we haven't had much significant snow except for an inch. She took my room, in which had all my clothes, and the table and bed I bought. 

Before her leaving back to Arizona, I told my uncle that I wanted my room back since I bought the table and all the stuff in here, literally moved all my things in and stuff. He agreed  that I would have my room back and that was it. Now today came my aunt, whose zodiac sign is a sheep (sheep's zodiac sign in Vietnamese culture are hard to live with, and are demanding, etc) She calls my grandpa telling him that I don't get the room. Now with that being said, the Arizonan worker just left and we have another worker whose a man, mixed, in his 40's taking my room now. My grandpa said I have nothing to do with this, then while moving all my clothes back (which were on the ground from the piece of mattress I've been sleeping on the past 6 months) I get a call from my aunt. Knowing that whenever she calls, it's up to no good and always something bad. I don't pick up. She textes me something and then my grandpa comes in to tell me of the conversation. She texted.. 

"Don't move in Ann room (the Arizonan worker) because Peter (the new worker) pay us $200 a month so that should be his room."

I respond..

"I'll pay 210 a month because I have a lot of clothes and the table for school already."

She textes:

"It's not the money tony. I want the worker to feel at home so they can stay n work for us."

First..

1. This worker DOES NOT have his license yet. He has a temporary license and he speaks HORRIBLE english. He's a terrible person who wants to use me all the time to teach him how to do the practical examination, translating the book and etc. 

2. So if it isn't about the money, why did you mention the money that he paid? If I pay more than him shouldn't I get the room? I haven't been paying rent and I don't need to because my uncle invited me to live here, he's a great person but his wife is a butt. 

That was the last straw for me as I was furious of all the things I've been having to deal with. Remember when I said I was a housemaid here? I clean two sinks full of dishes each day, help cook, mop and clean the floors and bathrooms, because that's my "duty" as she says. Cleaning after her kids too, who have no sense of respect or don't contribute to "chores" that kids these days have. All they do is play games on their iPhones. Did I mention they are in 7th grade, 2nd grade, and 9th grade? All of them go out ALL the time and sleep over at a friends house on the weekend. She doesn't let the 7th grader and  the 9th grader help because as in her own words "They do enough in this house. And they are tired."

There was this one time in the summer the plants were overgrowing. She called me to cut them; let me mention to you that these plants are razor sharp and they are WEEDS. I directly said back to her that I can't do it because they are sharp. With the excuse of having no gloves, she insulted me saying that her own children have been doing it. And as a response, I tell her that why don't she call her kids to do it then or rent someone. And.. she said "You live here for free. You eat free. You use the water free. And the electricity, and you can't cut the weeds?".

I was silent afterwards because I know my boundaries. I'm a clever person and calm, many have said that so I stopped to avoid further arguments. That was the day I lost all respect for her as she sees me as this maid. 

She is a huge, huge butt.. She wants me to basically live in the basement room where all the heater stuff is now. It's dusty in there. No way Jose...

THe last straw was today. My grandpa was so angered (poor him.. at his age he should be happy now) that we went out to look for apartments today. I have a whole list of apartments where him and I, along with his daughter can share two rooms. He's also a housekeeper too. Let me tell you how evil this aunt in law is: She purposely throws knives in the sink hidden under so that we can have a hard time to wash it and throw huge pans. You could at least leave the knives out and put the oily pots on the outside so there won't be hazards. 

It's time to take action now.. and you know what, I'm a strong person. I've been through so much already that this is just another test for me, a test of strength and I will prevail.

My grandpa and I were on our way to look for apartments on the other side of town, and after looking and writing down numbers on our yellow, notepad filled with notes; something told me that I should ask my grandpa if wanted to go in Safeway to test his blood pressure (as it's been high these days.) He agreed. We walked in the doors and saw this young lady who looked Vietnamese. We walked right past her and stopped and then my grandpa said, "Is she Vietnamese? She looks Vietnamese!! Ask her if she speaks Vietnamese." And then I approached her and talked in Vietnamese, asking her "Are you Vietnamese?" And she replied, in vietnamese "Yes! I am!" And she sounded very delighted to talk to us!! It turns out she was just visiting from Minnesota which is 12 hours away. My grandpa and I talked to her, and said that we were looking for apartments. She said that her husband was a real estate agent and that they have rooms for rent in their 3 houses in MN. I was SO shocked because it was like, an epiphany hit me and my grandpa. I met her husband, and now tomorrow we have a lunch date tomorrow at noon. She said that there's lots of Vietnamese people where she lives, and that she does nails too. Bingo. Potential employer and also friend who is like a family... I have no idea where of the whereabouts of the city that she has her 3 houses in, but I know it's a lot closer to my university in Brookings (South Dakota State University - otherwise known as SDSU). This has to be the work of a greater power.. because while in the car, my grandpa said to me that "We are good people. We help people, but bad things always happen to us." I reassured him that "God has a way of helping those in need, and to not worry." Then, that incident with that Vietnamese lady, known as "Cho Thanh" pops out at the safeway right at the door, getting ready to leave the store. Amazing!!!!

College wise, I received my residency applications and financial aid information for the upcoming school year. Spring semester starts in January 5th-ish. I haven't exactly made my decision yet, but I know that I need to make one soon or whether or not to start the school year without a car but my friend reassured me that loans were the way to go. There's plenty of people like me in college that start off with nothing, but are amazing people with well established careers. I'm very thankful of my uncle for helping me out get out of Georgia, either way - I'm good!! My self esteem has it's down days sometimes, but I always come back stronger. On the 15th of November, I take my state exams for my official permanent license to do nails. Hopefully I pass, but I'm sure I will! My heart says that I belong in Air Force so I've been looking at the ROTC program at SDSU. I can get commissioned as an officer. It's going to take a lot work but I can do it. I can feel it flowing through my veins.. success lies closer than you think if you work for it.

This is gonna be another beginning for me yet again. As one door closes, another one opens until I'm on top of the world. I'm sure it's the work of God; or something supernatural because I do feel my dad around me sometimes. 

Until next time,

blessings and hugs..

Anthony